Philosophers’ songbook #philbitescomp

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I was so inspired by the #philbitescomp twitter contest that I wrote a short history of philosophy in tweetable fragments of songs.

Parmenides’ lament:
I guess it will make a change
when things stop changing

Heracleitus’ blues:
I cried you the same river
thrice

Plato’s polka:
two steps out of the cave
and look at what you’re doing

Descartes’ swan song:
unbidden unwelcome it counts
yet for a penny I perish

Bishop Berkeley’s soccer fan chant:
Hey Samuel Johnson
You’re kicking that rock in my mind

Locke’s lullaby:
You’ve licked your plate clean
And now what do you know?

Kant’s shanty:
it’s a long way
from first principles

Voltaire’s spiritual:
Think low sweet chariot
Believe in Him and don’t cheat me

Hegel’s Carroll:
Give up the ghosts of times past
Master and slave, together at last

Marx’s revolutionary song:
I saw you coming Ford, a mile away
But Lenin came out of left field

Heidegger’s Rap:
With all my sein, I’ll do my zeit
Those sons of canines might not bite

Derrida and Wittgenstein’s duet:
Brick by brick move by move
you say circuses I say no more

High school philosophy teacher’s tattoo:
Be rational
you scabs

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